Jon Stewart is a funny dog.

My new birthday flashlight has a laser pointer thingy that Buzzkill has been having fun with all week. Stephen doesn't fall for these tricks, but man, oh man, Jon totally does.

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You ask them to do one thing and they do another.

But at least this time it was cute! I was trying to get the Punkinhead to show off her "find your nose" skills. Instead, she gave us a glimpse into her future as a cast member of The Lion King. That bit of cuteness is right up top in the show; the rest is fun to watch as well. Buzzkill on the sofa is about the height of his activity on weekends. Actually, he's a tremendous help with the Punkinhead on weekends. Also, Stephen Colbert and Jon Stewart make a rare appearance.

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The Neutering - Yes, it does sound like a horror movie.

I've meant to tell a little funny story about Jon Stewart and his snip-snip trip for a while. He got through it just fine, unlike his life companion Stephen Colbert's spaying. (Yes, I have the gender/operation correct. Boy Name + Female dog = You're caught up.) Stephen managed to chew her stitches out on Thanksgiving day, bleed all over my MIL's carpet, and cost $1000 in emergency (holiday) vet bills.

Why is it that boy dogs take 4 days to recover and the girls take 2 weeks? Even in animal recovery the female gets the bum deal. Well, the boys don't have it so hot either.....

Anyway, Buzzkill thankfully did not have reservations about Jon getting snip-snipped. I remembered my mother having to wait until my father was on a business trip to sneak the male cat to the vet for his, ummm, procedure. I don't think my father knows even now that the cat died "gender-neutral."

Jon was dropped off early morning and picked up late afternoon. While I was checking him out, the office assistant asked me if I wanted to spend an extra $8 for pain meds for him. She misconstrued the confused look on my face as an aversion for spending extra and assured me they weren't necessary. My confused look was because I didn't know I hadn't already asked for them. My response to her was, "We SURE DO want them. It's a firm rule in our house. If your testicles get removed, you get pain medication!"

When I told Buzzkill about the above exchange, he wavered between relief that I understood the importance of limiting male genital pain and fear that there was some reason for us to keep it an official "house rule."

Do you know what Punkinhead is looking at?

A very, very, very bad dog named Jon that help to make another embarrassing moment in HotMommy's life possible.

We've installed the baby gates in our great room and renamed it the great playpen since the Punkinhead crawls freely about in it. The dogs live in the kitchen and sunroom now with continuing access to the backyard through the doggy door. Our thought was that the dogs would only gain entrance to the great playpen when Buzzkill or I invited them through an open gate door. So, the gates would keep babies in; doggies out. Flawless plan, huh?

Except.......I was standing at the open front door with a neighbor, Punkinhead in her crib and the dogs supposedly behind the gates, when I feel a tiny dog (Jon) dart past my leg. I was totally shocked, but know I must catch him before he gets to the end of the block where he'll spot cars and be off after them.

I'm barefoot, in dirty sweat pants, spit-up covered tee, no makeup, uncombed hair, glasses, but glory, glory, I do have a bra on!

Now picture that sprinting down five front yards of moist grass yelling, "no, no, bad dog, Jon! Come here boy, bad Jon!" Yelling at the top of my lungs and I swear I've never seen so many people outside at 2 p.m. before. Everyone just stopped and looked at me chase Jon. Some people may have actually come outside just to watch.

I finally catch him after doing a hurdler's leap over a pile of poop. He's actually stopped to smell some poop when I get to him. Yuck. I scooped him up and then proceeded to do the "walk of shame" down the sidewalk back to my house. My neighbor thankfully closed the front door I forgot to close when I ran after Jon.

How did he get past the gate you ask? Well, he did a leap over the back of the sofa pushed up against the gate. I watched him do it again later in the day to get the remaining chicken sandwich from my TV tray. No running start or anything. He just sits and then springs up over it. He's less than a foot tall and apparently made of superballs. I'm talking about the bouncy toys, not his Cajones, but those are pretty big too if he thought it was okay to go investigating without a leash!

I'm always glad to give the neighbors a good show!

I promise I don't wear pearls and sweater sets

This is who we have talking about stay-at-home-mommyhood to the world? No wonder people think I' m crazy. Plus, I'm not sure she understands the irony of Stephen Colbert fully.....

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As many of you know, our dog Stephen Colbert recently got her (yeah, yeah, we know about the gender mix-up. blame Buzzkill) dog. He's another terrier mix that a friend of a friend rescued and we've named him, what else? Jon Stewart. So check out the photos above for the required ahhing. Jon's the tiny, soon-to-be neutered male on the right and Stephen's the girl on the left. At least, the gender is right this time.